Over many years I have been on a quest to find the ultimate miracle of healing. I felt if I could find a way to heal my pain, then I could also help others to heal theirs.
When I think back over all the time, courses, journeys and the money I've spent on this quest of mine, searching for the best teacher, best technique...looking for the holy grail of healing. So what did I learn? I learned that I had a massive addiction to a fairytale in an attempt to avoid my pain or me having to do any hard work. I wanted to be separated from the process, like going under general aesthetic, I wanted God or someone to take my wounds away, to wake up in the morning after a miracle being performed and it would all be gone. I wanted to be free of the horrible life long feelings of being unloveable and rejectable, having no identity and no value to my parents or to the world. I also found in avoiding my pain, ducking and weaving, using quick fixes, I was avoiding my healing, stuck in a never ending pattern of self deception. What I wanted is not the process of true healing for I discovered that I need to be fully present, awake and continuing to guide the process using my desire and will to heal. Being fully involved in the decision of what addictions I am willing to give up in order to heal.
God has created us in a way so we can only avoid things for so long, for there is a tipping point in which the level of truth of our pain becomes higher than our ability to avoid it. Where arrogance and stubbornness surrender into humility. Humans have an inbuilt self adjustment mechanism. a point of surrender, where all the labyrinth entries are blocked and there is no where else to hide (the movie/book, Life of Pi shows this so elegantly). I found myself in this place, there I was, stark naked, in full view of honesty admitting that I could no longer do this on my own. All my strength crumbled into a desperate, humbled little girls voice, daring to ask for help...from where I didn't know...out there somewhere I suppose, perhaps ...I pray I hope that God will come.
Over the past 4 years and more so over the past 2 years, I have definitely found what I was looking for, the holy grail of healing. The grail itself is my soul and my willingness to open and receive love, Divine Love. A love directly given from God that heals and transforms all. Along with this love comes God's Forgiveness, Grace and Mercy.
Because of my childhood and maybe you can relate too, there was much harm projected towards me. And when this happens over time, a rage develops within and is projected out to the world in the form of DEMAND. Its like an animal who is badly mistreated becomes mistrustful and attacking as a way of protection from more harm. In this scenario, there is no space for love. Something has to change if we want to heal. Even though the demand upon the world feels justified and self righteous.
Forgiveness and Repentance both come from a soul-full sincere emotional feeling process, nothing changes at the soul level with little, insincere or forcefully demanded words.
The Five Stages of Repentance (Remorse and Forgiveness) thank you Mary Luck for this gift.
This engages one of the highest Laws of Love - Law of Forgiveness, Grace and Mercy, which supersedes the Law of Compensation (Karma)
For the harm we have done to Others and Self, without self punishment. The process of healing only works if it is done without the act or feeling of self punishment. As soon as this element comes in, healing stops. ( I had an ant show me this truth). Our essence Divine Compassion helps us to draw on soul qualities of compassion, kindness, patience and love.
1. The intellectual awareness that I've harmed another.
2. An emotional acknowledgement of my unloving behaviour.
3. A desire to experience the pain that I have created in them.
4. A desire to find the emotional cause of why I did this thing that was unloving, and then to emotionally experience that. (what cause me to do this)
5. A desire to do every single thing to correct the harm that I have done, including taking action to reverse it and asking for forgiveness from the person.
Process of Forgiving Others
1. Courage to feel and express emotions (anger, fear, hurt, shame, grief)
2. Grieve how much it hurt and deprived you
3. Feel the unjustness and unfairness (refrain from vengeance and revenge)
4. What causes them to do this to me
Here is the One step to Forgiveness
Forgiveness is the process of feeling ALL of the pain, all the unfairness and unjustness that was caused to you by that person. You only completely forgive them when there is none left inside of you. Forgiveness is the automatic feeling when all injury is gone.
Forgiveness is a soul gift to you and the person you are forgiving. This will help them one day when it is time for them to feel the emotion of what they have done to you through remorse.
Remember these processes apply to: the harm you have done to others, the harm you have done to yourself and the harm people have done to you.
This is the fastest way to grow our soul in love and one the ultimate ACTS OF LOVE for ourselves and the world.
Click on our Slideshow below for more photos. And for more information about Forgiveness and Repentance, here are links to videos:
Truth About Repentance and Forgiveness Part 1
Truth about Repentance and Forgiveness Part 2